We're like a lot better than the average bears
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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