quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
