Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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