please come you make the beer taste better
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize
