My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
