I think im going to throw up on grandma
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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