It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
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and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
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I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?