he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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