so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
Randomize
