Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Randomize
