so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
what the fuck happened to the tacos
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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