i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
