singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I'm always down for nudity.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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