is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Randomize
