Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Randomize
