Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
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