im drinking this country out of the recession.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize