I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
