Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
they call him Oral-B. enough said
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
