It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
