Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
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