Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
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