He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
