i already hear my dad disowning me
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
