But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
