If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Randomize
