Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize