im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
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