i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
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What a dumb baby whore.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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