I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
please come you make the beer taste better
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall