dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
