the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
