yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
