i think my tv is drunk
babies were throwing up all over the place
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
