weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
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