Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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