you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
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