Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize