I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
