We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize
