The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Randomize
