margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
