Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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