either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
