I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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