I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize
