i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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