in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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