Midget sex pt 2 tonight
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
