Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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