I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
