WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize
