matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Randomize
